Monday, April 23, 2018

Finding a "New Normal"

Wow.....  Nine years since my last post.  A lot has happened...

Jason and I got married.
We had Jacob.
We separated.
Jason's diabetes got worse and he lost a leg.
We worked through a lot of our issues so we could function cohesively together in separate homes.
Jason lost his second leg.
He spent nine months in Rehabs/Assisted Living/Nursing Homes.
We were able to get him into his own apartment with an aide.
We had a fantastic year of joint custody and cooperation.
He Died.
I cleaned out the apartment and took over full time 100% Jacob.
Distaff Day had it's 14th Annual gathering in January.

Which brings me to today's topic.  Finding a "New Normal".

So much has changed in 9 years.  You can't start back at the beginning.  You can't dwell on the past, recent or distant.  What to do....  It's been evolving in my brain for the past month or two, slowly taking shape.  Being molded like clay.  We need to find our new normal. 

For a long time, what I "needed to do" took precedence over everything else.  I needed to assist Jason when he had issues.  I needed to make sure that Jacob was cared for, had what he needed, went to school, etc.  I needed to work.  I needed to keep us afloat.  Doing only what you need to, sometimes because it's all you can do to manage that, is not living.

Now I'm realizing that I need to prioritize what's important, and make sure it happens!

  • Take control of my health and my eating!
  • Find a balance between eating out every day and only cooking at home!
  • Set schedules and rules!
  • Insist on daily showers (no, not for me....well, yes, for both of us...)!
  • Give myself permission to take a down day!
  • Give us permission to go play for a day - alternating between mommy play days and kid play days!
  • Find more time in my day, any way I can that doesn't involve less sleep!
  • KNIT!
Through many different methods, I feel like I can do this!  I'm motivated and not waiting until tomorrow to start!  If you read this, thank you.  I really don't think it will be another 9 years before my next post. 

1 comment:

Topenchilada (Laura J) said...

You can do this. I have confidence in you. Be gentle with yourself (& Jacob, too). Little by Little, you'll get there.